At the end of the day why do I feel like it is such a challenge? It shouldn’t be this way, grateful for the day “this world has to offer” but in reality, we live in a materialistic culture and the whole process of romancing someone and having this american dream has become a commercialized mess. If you’re barely able to pay the rent and feed yourself and kids you’re definitely not going to feel like an attractive prospect, male or female. And how are you going to afford all that fun stuff you’re clearly obligated to do? A regular relationship becomes another regular expense. From my experience: it is hard to love while in an unstable life, but if you are lucky enough to have it happen it can help build a strong bond. My significant other (of ten years) and I got together when we had our first child I was having problems and he was between jobs because she had just moved back to town. He took a lower paying job than expected so we lived on very little, but still really enjoyed each other despite not being able to do much. Then we both started make good money and life was good. Really good. When the economy bombed our city was hurt worse than most and my business crashed. My husband was also laid off and it took months to find a lower paying job. We were broke again but not only attacked the challenge as a team (rather than it driving us apart) but found we could still have a lot of fun without going to movies or eating out. When things got even tighter we found that we still enjoyed each other despite not being able to buy anything, ever.
The lesson: we got together because we enjoyed each other, not because we enjoyed doing things together. It is easy to feel feel love when eating out and shopping. Harder when you are scrimping. If you can look at each other and smile when you are drowning in crap, you can take on the world together.
The mind will play these silly games in your head “Y”. Keeping it positive, keeping your day job. I want to strive, life is to short to be always looking at the past, your not living in the moment if we’re wondering about the future. Live in the Present and Keep on Trucking.